Once that discussion is covered and contingencies put into action, you can continue with questions about funding. If the answer is 'we don?t know', or 'no', at least you can prepare yourself to help them down the road or, better still, help them help themselves.

Retiring at 60 or 65 may not be an option for them and they may not even want to retire. Help them explore second careers or phased retirement.

If you really cannot face talking to them about these issues, then write an email with a strong emphasis on care and concern. Maybe even ask your spouse to handle it, especially if he or she has a good relationship with your parents. They may not be as emotionally involved as you and they can explain your discomfort.

Your goals should be to learn where to find information and encourage them to gather it all together in an organised file and to get a fix on their financial situation. You do not need to know the exact details of their wealth at this stage, but a basic picture is important.

Most parents will find it a relief to get these details taken care of. So, if the unexpected happens at least there will not be the added stress of looking for vital documents.

Do not forget to include siblings in this process. You may all have to band together to help your parents out. Forward planning can significantly improve the situation of all parties involved. This topic is a vital part of financial planning and should not be hidden behind taboos.

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