This is the final instalment of Kabous le Roux's two-part series on self-limiting beliefs about money. We suggest reading part one, "Beliefs that hold us back", before continuing on with this article.
"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." — Wayne Dyer
The first step is to identify your self-limiting beliefs. This is vital, because up until now you were probably unaware of their existence and have mistaken them for reality. Write down everything that comes to mind when you think of your money desires. For example, write, "I want to be rich" on one side of a piece of paper. On the other side write down all the "buts". Keep on writing until you've written down all the "buts" you can think of.
It also helps to look into your childhood and the effect that parents, teachers and others had on your ideas about money. What did he/she/they tell you about being rich?
Take your list of self-limiting beliefs and write down an exception to every belief that you can. For example, "I want to be rich, but I don't have any money and it takes money to make money". Now think about someone like Harry Potter author JK Rowling, for example, or any of the rags-to-riches stories we so often read about. "I want to be rich, but know I never can". I suggest talking to rich people about how they made their money. The more people you speak to, the more you'll become aware of aspects about them and their circumstances that you were unaware of. You might find that some of them are not as smart as you, or come from a poor family or whatever. The point is that many rich people were, objectively speaking, probably less likely than you to become loaded.
The beauty of this exercise is that you only need to come up with one exception to your belief to confirm that it's not an absolute "rule" that applies to everybody.
Finding an exception to a belief is not really that hard, but what if you have a restraining belief that pertains to you as individual? For example, you might say, "I accept that this doesn’t apply to everyone, but I'm stupid so it applies to me".
This one is much harder, because it entails learning to love yourself just because you are. You shouldn't love yourself because you’re a good person or friendly or likeable, but simply because you are. Stop criticising yourself; simply try and become aware of your thoughts and feelings. Let them come and go without judgment, but mere attentiveness.
When you're aware of a belief, and how it limits you, verbalise and write down your intention to eliminate it. Setting out an intention like this is in itself a powerful thing.
Life is full of surprises!
Think of a limiting belief you have right now, and then look back on your life and all the things you never thought you'd be able to do.
I never believed I would travel the world and make lifelong friends with people from all over. But I did. I never believed that I'd become an online editor when I unexpectedly got deported from Taiwan after living there for five years and arriving in South Africa without a cent and very little work experience. But I did.
I never believed that one day I'd be chatting to a stranger on the dance floor and months later we'd be engaged. But that's what happened.
Time after time every person on the planet achieves things they thought they couldn’t. So, if you've got a belief that's holding you back and you can't get rid of it, just keep trying anyway. Feel that limiting belief wash over you, then do it anyway!